borderline


Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
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Yeah, i thought i wasn't going to update today.
Turns out i went to bed early because i felt like hell, then woke up at 1:00am.
Yay.

i've been feeling like crap, and today didn't help.
Yes, prepare your brains, filthy beasts of skin and hair;
for i am about to bitch and moan.

i woke up today and it happened.
i've been waiting for it to happen; with no pictures or anything i was bound to, i guess.
i just sort of always knew it would come along.
i woke up this morning and i knew, deep down, that i couldn't remember reliably
just what Jennifer's face looked like.

Yeah, i have the idealized, smiling image in my mind still, but it's fuzzy, you wave?
Like i'll think, 'just what was her nose like? Was it a perfect little sloped one like Smurfies,
or more snub like mine was?
Did her eyes have a bunch of different colors in them, or were they just solidly that
stormy-ocean color i loved?
Did her cheeks dimple when she smiled? i sort of remember that, or was it just one?

Anyways, yeah. So.
Then, second news of the day; i just got hit by this TOTALLY off the wall thing at werk.
My co-worker, Adrianna, whom i detest nine days out of ten, and tolerate the other 10%
went out for a smoke; and when she came back in, she said something random to me, just
making small talk.
The reason i can't remember, was because i was seized by this nostalgia for the taste of a girl
who's just finished a cigarette. How disgusting is that?
But some screwed-up, dysfunctional part of my mind just WANTED it.
Ergo, i spent the remaining three and a half hours of werk thouroughly disgusted with myself.
i better pull out of this funk soon, dammit.
i just really had better.

Courtesy.

- posted by Third @ 2:54 AM